Little boxes.

Brilliant. I love the creativity of this song. I love the creativity of this video. I love the creativity of this band. And then I feel sad because the message of this song is not lost on me. And then the blurry, vague line between living within the rules and norms that keep us all safe, and simply bowing to conformity overwhelms me. And then I feel sad that we have collectively lost the drive to create and express ourselves in divinely personal ways and that the only way left to define ourselves seems to be this wheel of mindless consumption. And then I feel angry that so many of the people around me can't see human success beyond brand names and dollar signs ..................... and then I eat some chocolate and drink a glass of wine and that feeling goes away ................ a little. ;)

http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.walkofftheearth.com%2Fvideo%2Flittle-boxes&h=eAQFVfmbVAQEotIvbhkKXV6l5VXKb6qZDQ415-UcH5opEjw

Hey neighbour ..... won't you be?

I try to live my life focused on the positive and I remind myself daily how very lucky I am to live in such a safe and engaged community. But here’s the thing: something always seems to ‘pop up’ that makes me ‘pop off’. Now, I’m no conformist but I don’t view rule following as weakness. Following the rules is how I keep myself, and you, safe at the same time. I don’t get up every day promising to make the world better for anyone, but I can at least not make it worse. That, for the most part, is within my power.

At the risk of being wearily sentimental, I think of Mr. Rogers and his song about neighbours and neighbourhood, when I think about the ideal community. “It’s a beautiful day in this neighbourhood. A beautiful day for a neighbour.” A group of people invested in each other’s safety and happiness. But then I go outside. The people of my community seem to get behind the wheel, and shut their neighbours off. As soon as I leave the house I see the drivers of our community break the rules about speed, about driver distraction, about safety and courtesy. I ask myself what is it that causes them to disengage from the people around them?

When I grew up, in the very neighbourhood I live in now, I trusted my neighbours to look out for me. I would head out on my orange bike with the banana seat and believed my neighbours would follow the rules that would keep me safe. Flash forward to today and I know I don’t trust my neighbours; I don’t trust them to put my child’s safety ahead of their time or convenience or impulse. I find myself grumbling that it is because they are selfish or that some deep character flaw causes them to risk our safety and their own. While I strive to be an optimist, I am far too often pessimistic. I forget that they are my neighbours and suffer the same stresses and trials as I do. That the rules of the road have simply not become meaningful to them because they have not engaged with their neighbours.

Fred Rogers, in addition to being “Mr. Rogers” was a beautiful writer and speaker. He believed deeply in the capacity for goodness in human beings. He said “how sad it is that we give up on people who are just like us”. So I choose not to give up. This Spring I would like to remind you to slow down, take care, and remember that roads are not built for cars but for people. I have decided to believe we can do it. So what is the least you can do for a neighbour? “Won’t you please, won’t you please? Please won’t you be my neighbour?”

Happy Spring,

Lita

Just for fun:

http://pbskids.org/rogers/songLyricsWontYouBeMyNeighbor.html

Where is this candidate? **caution I swear in this one**

I wrote this during the latest Provincial election for my own amusement. Perhaps it will amuse others.

My platform.

I am announcing my run for office. Which office? It matters not.

If I am elected I will invoke the following:

Candidates running for all parties must pass a basic math competency exam. You can NOT bribe the voters by promising to lower personal taxes AND suck up to corporations by promising to lower corporate taxes AND promise to make the cost of living cheaper and paying dividends and get away with it. That is bad math; and since there is no money fairy clearly those candidates are lying or are really bad at math. Passing the math competency will allow us to prove the former.

Every future candidate will be given a campaign assistant, a used minivan, 40 hours of television or radio (for the entire 6 week campaign), and a $1000 Tims card. That’s it. No more buying votes, greased wheels, or influence peddling. Prove yourself, by yourself, that way you owe nothing to anyone when you actually win.

Any member of my party who is a fuckwit is out. If you speed in a school zone, yell at the waiter because your Perrier was flat, in fact even order Perrier, park in the premiers stall and then berate and threaten the job of the security guard who tries to get you to move your sorry ass, text while driving, take a kickback, say (EVER) “don’t you know who I am?” then YOU are a fuckwit and you are OUT! This list is not exhaustive and can be expanded upon request.

I will take the point of view that, in almost all cases, what is good for all of us is what is good for each of us. YOU are not special; neither am I, but we are all important. That is why the needs of us as a society together will take priority.

I will strengthen rights and their corresponding responsibilities. Our justice system will weigh whether or not you have lived up to your responsibilities, if not, you will lose your rights. Many will call me “a communist”; they can shove their ‘freedom fries’ right up their ass.

I promise to LISTEN to the issues before making a decision. I can’t tell you at this moment what each of my decisions will be because I don’t know the complexities of the actual ISSUES yet. Therefore I will not blow sunshine up your ass by pretending to know now. You will need to decide if you believe in the content of my character and the passion of my heart and vote for me only if you believe I WILL always try to make the best decision possible.

I will promise to remember that I am a PUBLIC SERVANT! I work for you. I will act like that, but you must remember that running for office does not mean that I find public ridicule, personal attacks, or defamation acceptable. I am a human being with feelings and we already know what the ‘unfeeling’ political pros can accomplish for themselves when they have no sensitivity or conscience.

Public servants and public institutions will strictly adhere to an egalitarian practice. You may certainly believe that your race, or gender, or sexuality is superior to another’s in your home or place of worship, but at work you WILL treat everyone as equal to you. Your rights are NOT infringed by someone else’s “being”. If you don’t like it then don’t BE it, but don’t think you get to be in anyone else’s way of being it. No; not on public dollars. Not on my watch.

I promise you WILL pay taxes, and so will the companies you work for. I promise to spend that money as ethically, effectively, and prudently as possible. I promise that the jobs I help create will be good ‘living wage’ jobs. I promise I will treat the workers in my jurisdiction as valuable and worthy. I will require businesses that operate within my jurisdiction to do the same. I will make people power valuable.

I will properly fund scientific research so we can once again become a leader in true medical advancement, not just pills that make millions of dollars by giving you a 6 hour erection. Research in all disciplines will be merit based not product based; in other words: actual science. Plus all those research foundations will stop calling me at home on a Tuesday night at 9:30 pm. It's win - win.

I will make the education of children paramount. All children will attend public school where through a variety of, mostly inclusive, methods the playing field will be leveled. Period. Creativity will be necessary to give each child what he or she needs to become a capable, engaged, happy citizen. We will not always succeed. Parents who expect their children be given special treatment at the expense of others will be sent to “don’t be a fuckwit parent’ school. Sorry, that’s just the way it is.

I will regulate products and industry. Producers and corporations who continually break rules which put consumers or workers in danger will not be allowed to operate in my jurisdiction. If there is melamine in the crackers you make, or someone drowns in your tailings pond, then you FAIL. I will not be a dumbass when utilities promise that deregulation will mean “choice” and “competitive pricing”. Gas prices jumping 3 days before a long weekend will be a felony. (No price collusion MY ASS.) Governments make rules about how companies and corporations can operate because PEOPLE COME FIRST.

Lastly, I promise to actually think about issues before making a decision. I know I said this already but it bears repeating. I will not be able to monitor every area of government so I promise to put smart, capable people who I trust on each portfolio. They may NOT even be members of my party. I will not appoint giggling hyenas who will leave office just to become lobbyists for the companies who we rewarded contracts to. I promise to punch any cabinet minister who ends up a paid figure head for a company he or she awarded contracts to while in office …….. in the throat ……….. very hard.

Good night.

Life with Boys

This was written on October 13th, 2011. My boys are growing up and I don't want these little moments lost ...... 

Sometimes as a parent, there is a "miss" in our teaching. The new world demands that children know the facts about their bodies, and all the proper names. It's to promote safety and ownership. I have dutifully taught them. 

Yesterday morning Pearson came in for his morning cuddle and asked "Mommy, why do you always have a 'peegina'?" 

"Ummmmm" I fluster, "You mean Vagina?" 

"Girls have Vaginas and boys have Penises. We've talked about it, haven't we?" I inquire.

"Yes, but I like it when you wear pants." he replies.

Pause.

"I would still have a Vagina under my pants sweetie" I say

"Why would you wear pants under a 'pAgina'?" he queries.

Realization dawns upon me ......"Oh geez, are you asking about my NIGHTIE? A dress that a lady wears to bed is a nightie ........ a top and pants is pajamas - just like for boys! It's the same word. And a dress a lady wears is a nightie."

"Oh, well I like when you wear paJAMAS better." he says and snuggles in. 

......

....

Seriously, ...... I will call my nightie a pAgina forever now!

And from earlier in the year:

Window into parenting 2 boys ...

Me "Boys, you know the bad man who stole the little boy in BC, well he returned the little boy but the police haven't arrested him yet. Do you remember what Mom said about strangers and school?"

Pearson "that they're bad."

Me "Sort of; I said that you must never get in a car with someone you don't know, or leave anywhere with a grownup you don't feel safe with"

Jasper "What if they make us?"

me "You must kick, and flail, and make as much noise as possible."

Pearson "and we can kick him in the wiener!"

J "Yeah, and punch him in the crotch!"

P "Yah, kick him in the crotch"

Me (now losing control of the conversation) "Do whatever you need to to get away and then run to the closest 'safe stranger' and yell and yell."

P "then I'll punch him in the butt!"

J "I'll kick him in the butt"

Me (conversation seriously skidding off road) "Yes but, if you run around punching and kicking then you are moving towards the bad man and not away from. Please just RUN AWAY and get help."

........... (10 full minutes of insane giggling and re enactments of their techniques.)

I should have just stuck with "Say NO, GO, and TELL SOMEONE" Arrrgh.

But you see, Public school is MY church.

There is a disturbing phenomenon in our society right now. A movement afoot that I thought I would never live to see. The intolerant are crying “intolerance” because they can’t be intolerant. The notion is almost comical, yet here we are, and it’s actually not that funny.

Canada’s true history is not noble or pretty or fair, but the society that I have seen rise from the past and strive for greatness deserves respect. We have not achieved full equality yet, but it has always felt to me that on some level we were moving that in direction. We have long viewed our diversity as a difficult, complicated, and very worth the trouble. All the differences between us should make it impossible to coexist and yet we do. We even manage to thrive. How is that possible? Canada was built by a long series of fairly homogenous groups each trying to exert power over one another until, at last, the futility of it all changed us …… and we evolved. I wish I could have witnessed the moment when ideas and ways of being began to be exchanged as commodities but from that point we have begun a slow march towards a true multicultural society. I know there are always those who fight it, but we have begun to live at ease among one another and we have made it beautiful. All the different colours, and languages, and beliefs living together peacefully and (far from a melting pot) we have remained a polarized, messy, mosaic.

I believe in my heart that public school is a main reason. Children are thrown together and asked to manage what their parents can only hope to emulate; an environment of tolerance, respect, and equality. We place them all together, ask that the playing field be leveled as much as possible, and give them all the same chance. We have built curriculums that have the potential to create well rounded citizens who are able to follow their interests and dreams wherever they might lie. Children are given an overview of the choices available to them in a free society and take steps towards their adult selves with the same knowledge base as all their peers. There is a magical utopian quality to that. The school boards walk the razors edge between allowing every child to come replete with their own beliefs, and keeping those beliefs from colliding in destructive discourse, resentment, and conflict. They achieve this largely through keeping the multitude of intransigent religious view points out, particularly if they run counter to an inclusive, peaceful society. Now yes, I concede that there is an overwhelmingly Christian slant to most public schools in Canada. We observe the holidays, make the crafts, and sing the songs but it is more a ‘Christian theme park’ approach and it stops short of much, if any, religious teaching. I, personally, am pretty much an atheist and would love to take it all out or schools or, better yet, teach children about all the major religions in pamphlet style; give them an overview of all the major faiths and then move on.

In my opinion, Public school should be mandatory and must remain secular. There is a greater good that is served by us all learning to get along. Allowing groups to break away and learn in these little unchallenged homogenous groups does not teach the skills required to get along with everyone in the future. If you’ve learned to be together in school then you will have discovered all the ways that you are the same, instead of focusing on all the ways you are different. Let’s call it ‘competency in togetherness’ and it does not need to mean that you give up your beliefs.

An overarching rule of fairness must be in place for this to work. This means you don’t get to come in and constantly tell the other people in public school that you think they are going to your version of hell, or will only be reincarnated as a worm, or won’t get into your version of heaven. There is no practical benefit of that, no sensible place to draw the line about who gets to say, and every chance that children, REAL CHILDREN, will be hurt. The argument that maintaining a standard of non-discriminatory fairness somehow discriminates is ridiculous. It’s time to end this conversation. You don’t believe it ok to be gay, so then don’t be gay. The argument is exactly the same for whatever argument gets thrown in the mix (distasteful to me or not). You don’t believe it’s ok to marry people of another race, so then don’t. You don’t believe it’s ok to follow a faith other than your own, so then don’t. Public School’s job in every case is to say “so then don’t, but in the spirit of fairness to ALL the children that is not open to debate here”.

The best way I can think of to make my point is this: If I got to come into your church and claim that your views went against my strongly held beliefs in science, evolution, and atheism and was offending me, you would simply show me the door. You argue that Public school curriculum is, more or less, mandatory and so then you must be accommodated or given an out. But the “out” is not your own schools; the number of Christians who refer to other Christians as “not real Christians” over conflicting viewpoints illustrates why this would not work. No, the “out” is retreat to a nation state comprised of only people who believe what you do and offers the same privileges and standard of living as here …………. My guess is that is does not exist. My guess is that would not be what you would want. Me neither. I like my big messy mosaic. I like it’s conflict and diversity. I like it’s colours. I like it’s defiance of the odds. We have managed to make something bigger than the sum of our groups; a society of fairness. Public school IS my church. Don’t come into my church and ask me to make it more fair for you by making it less fair for someone else. Public school IS my church.