Life with Boys

This was written on October 13th, 2011. My boys are growing up and I don't want these little moments lost ...... 

Sometimes as a parent, there is a "miss" in our teaching. The new world demands that children know the facts about their bodies, and all the proper names. It's to promote safety and ownership. I have dutifully taught them. 

Yesterday morning Pearson came in for his morning cuddle and asked "Mommy, why do you always have a 'peegina'?" 

"Ummmmm" I fluster, "You mean Vagina?" 

"Girls have Vaginas and boys have Penises. We've talked about it, haven't we?" I inquire.

"Yes, but I like it when you wear pants." he replies.

Pause.

"I would still have a Vagina under my pants sweetie" I say

"Why would you wear pants under a 'pAgina'?" he queries.

Realization dawns upon me ......"Oh geez, are you asking about my NIGHTIE? A dress that a lady wears to bed is a nightie ........ a top and pants is pajamas - just like for boys! It's the same word. And a dress a lady wears is a nightie."

"Oh, well I like when you wear paJAMAS better." he says and snuggles in. 

......

....

Seriously, ...... I will call my nightie a pAgina forever now!

And from earlier in the year:

Window into parenting 2 boys ...

Me "Boys, you know the bad man who stole the little boy in BC, well he returned the little boy but the police haven't arrested him yet. Do you remember what Mom said about strangers and school?"

Pearson "that they're bad."

Me "Sort of; I said that you must never get in a car with someone you don't know, or leave anywhere with a grownup you don't feel safe with"

Jasper "What if they make us?"

me "You must kick, and flail, and make as much noise as possible."

Pearson "and we can kick him in the wiener!"

J "Yeah, and punch him in the crotch!"

P "Yah, kick him in the crotch"

Me (now losing control of the conversation) "Do whatever you need to to get away and then run to the closest 'safe stranger' and yell and yell."

P "then I'll punch him in the butt!"

J "I'll kick him in the butt"

Me (conversation seriously skidding off road) "Yes but, if you run around punching and kicking then you are moving towards the bad man and not away from. Please just RUN AWAY and get help."

........... (10 full minutes of insane giggling and re enactments of their techniques.)

I should have just stuck with "Say NO, GO, and TELL SOMEONE" Arrrgh.